The List Goes On...

So after a bitchfest and a half, I have returned to order and I will succumb to the singular demand of reading material, (Yes, Poison, this is for you sweets.)

"So he said he wanted to anally fist me..."

Wow, that's just out there, isn't it? There are two problems with this statement. First, if he actually said, "Hey Doll, I'm in the mood to fist the booty," he's officially killed the possibility. Second, he wants to fist your ass! Although I've got some flavors of kink all my own, getting elbows deep in the muck that is your asshole is not one of them. How deep do you think it is? How bout we just go all out and you stick your head up there. Get crazy with it. That is the last time I will ever say I'm going to kick someone's ass. I may just slip in. Ew!

Policing Profiles

This one goes way back. People do this all the time, checking to see who you call a friend and what you say about yourself, what groups you are apart of and how much you divulge about your RL. Everyone is curious, otherwise we wouldn't have profiles. I am a self proclaimed Profile Whore. BUT...getting pissy over where someone goes or who a person chills with is really none of your fucking concern. Especially when you are the type of person to say you don't care or you don't want to be close to said person you are spying on. Just admit that you are highly interested in keeping that control you seem to think you are entitled to and move on. I think they have support groups for this type of illness.

Verbal Vomits

If I IM you to say hello, feel free to say a little bit more then your piss and moan session. This one would probably not be as big of an offense if I actually considered us friends. But we aren't. So informing me of "your side," isn't really something I'm interested in.

Becoming What You Hate

I think it's extremely funny when a guy shits on a girl for joining Gor. Am I a personal fan of it? Not really. But everyone has a right to explore whatever form of fun and excitement they so desire. That being said, a guy hating Gor as a choice for someone that they themselves pushed away is selfish. And you can rationalize that this person is making a mistake because of the demoralizing/degrading situation they may put themselves into but aren't you doing the exact same thing by bashing this girl for being a free woman and making a choice? Being concerned that someone is in a controlled situation is one thing, being upset because you are no longer the person in control is by far, another.

Groveling

Feel free to save that shit. Just because a guy confronted you for being a shmuck doesn't mean I'll accept the apology.

Bad Inspiration

"OMG, Cute Outfit. You totally inspired me to dress up," says the 2006 noob looking vet. You have officially insulted me and I now feel the need to burn this outfit. Purple legs...cuz those aren't pants...yellow flowery tube top and no shoes...How did I inspire the girl? She puts on a fucking black painted on the skin blazer. WHERE IS THE COLLAR! THE CUFFS? STOP DOING THAT SHIT! In 2006 that shit may have been forgivable but we are evolving like monkeys. MONKEY'S I SAY! We've got sculpties and prim shit and stuff that doesn't look...like that. If you talk to me again, I will blast out your god damn kidneys.

 Friends who would rather kill a bond then tell the truth

You fucked with him. BIG DEAL! He already spread the word that you like to tickle the booty while you talk on the phone. It's out there, mamita. We all know about your coke bottle fetish. I won't hate on you but killing a two year friendship rather then telling the truth makes you a fucking douchebag. Or rather, a used shit bag. Which you can purchase at Walmart or Target for 4.99 plus tax.

Being A Backup Plan

NO ONE wants to be a backup. Your obsession is gonna be gone for awhile and now you want to say "hi sweetie." Listen Bill, you noob looking narcissistic herpes sore, she's not interested. Feel free to wait for Nikki with her whorish noob ways and sit on a fucking thimble, you tight ass.

So, Like...I'm A Vampire...

And I'm like...so not impressed. Join the fucking club, sweetheart. Better yet, join a group. I know a religion you can join and a title you can rock. "I drink blood." Yeah, and I eat grilled cheese sandwiches. Bet you get a disease before I do! I've always wondered what being a leper feels like. Let me know how that works out for you.

Hanging Out Doesn't Mean You Get A Fuck Pass

That one is self explanatory. Here's a clue. Fuck the mind and the body will follow. It's called stimulus and there are actually people out there who have it in their...upper heads. I think I should introduce you to bobbledom Bill and you two can engage in all the ass play you so please. Here's a clue cutie, leave the smart ones alone. 4 words. Out Of Your League.

I swear, you fucks come out of the woodworks. FTN!